Last night

My coworker email to ask what I did last night and I wrote back:

Birthday party at the Casanova, had martinis, champagne & birthday cake for dinner. Hung out at Dolores park til late drinking rum like a pirate. Crashed a weird house party/rave then went to the lone palm and talked about science til it was time to ride my bike home. You know, the ushe.

Oh, summertime.

text games to play

So I'm deleting these text from my phone (sent box). But they are really good, and I want to preserve them. I was playing one of my favorite games called 'what are you wearing?' that I play with myself all the time and sometimes with dudes. (I am typically more into it, but most dudes are boring dressers anyway).

"Heading Home. tight vintage dress, black sheer AP bra, knickers, heels (obvs), lipgloss, hotel costes body oil. sweet dreams, etc. j"

"High Waisted vintage pink sheer knickers, thin grey tee shirt, wet hair, smelling like vetiver, velvet, and talc. sweet dreams, j"

so there. now these sexytime texts are for my ladies who can motherfucking appreciate it.

Crazypants stalkerpants

I’m open to pretty much any suggestions at this point. Crazystalkerpants girl has been calling 4 times a day, and stopping by my apartment just to, you know, call me a slut or a whore (sometimes skank or ho). The police haven't done anything about it yet, and I just don't know what to do...I keep trying to remind myself that’s she’s a.) crazy, and b.) probably doing this to like ten other people, and c.) dudes it’s like I’m a celebrity!, but really, this is just annoying. Anyone know how to set up a surveillance camera in my building lobby and/or want to volunteer for a stakeout with me? Ugh.

last week...

...i went to a party with a dude (at his house), and i ended up chatting with his hilarious roommate (girl) for too long and he actually got all pouty and went to his room! me and the roommate were like...what a baby! after hanging out with her for like an hour and polishing off a bottle of champs, i had to do a secret knock for him to let me in and we watched the simpsons in his loft bed. i declined his invite to stay over. his roomate is awesome, though and we've totally been texting. ladies rule.

want.

Here it goes again... I have these pumps in black and red eel skin (well, AND blue eel skin but those are open toed) and this fall they're coming out in...pink. Maybe I'm just feeling all retarded from watching the Sex and the City movie this weekend with my mom, but DAMN. I want more stilettos in my life. Well, at least these ones.


Oh, also, Sergio Rossi website has 40% off all spring/summer '08 styles, including those paint-drip heels that were all over everywhere

Comments/New posts

I've enabled comments so you won't have to log in to leave them. I'll keep it this way unless crazypants stalker finds me here and/or creepy dudes leave too many weird messages.


Also, let me know if you want to be emailed whem I post a new blog. I'm not promising it'll be good...just that I'll let you know it's there.

Second date = second base (stealing third)

So I went on a second date with A last week. First date was drinks, an awesome movie, then more drinks. It went really well and we said we'd get together again soon. And then…

I was home baking strawberry rhubarb pies when A called and offered to host an evening including his big screen tv, impressive movie collection, and, uh, bed. Obvs I LOVE watching tv, and in combination with a dude to mack on I was so there. After my pies came out of the oven, I put on a slut outfit (clothing appropriate for the nighttime AND work the next day), got too lazy to walk and called a cab. (which took like 45 minutes and I was really annoyed by then but whatever.) He lives really close to me so I got there in no time. We made small talk and decided to watch fairly obscure David Cronenberg film.

Anyway, we were cuddled up a bit, mocking the shitty dialogue and amazing mullet on the main character and it didn't take long before dude was getting all gropy and he kept leaning over to kiss me. I didn't really mind too much, since that's what I was there for and typically, I like dudes who make the moves on me. So we progressed from kissing/cuddling, to him playing with my tits (awesome) and my dress was on the floor/his shirt was off. At some point he said to me …"turn around I want to spank you," and I was like OK, because I always think a little kink is fun and who doesn't like getting spanked? Kinky boys always make me giggly/horny so I was pretty stoked. I'm thinking, way to keep it fun and interesting dude.

So I turn around, he slaps my ass a couple times playfully, and I was waiting for him to make the next move (either break into laughter, or, like take it to whatever next level that stuff goes to) and all of a sudden I hear him ripping open a condom and he says, "I really want to slide into you, you're so hot." Which was a bit abrupt to go from jokingly rolling around the bed to full on hitting it from behind THE FIRST TIME WE (were maybe going to) HAVE SEX. I mean, I hadn't given him an indication I was for sure going to fuck him yet, so I thought he was being a bit presumptuous.

Having been in plenty of casual sex situations before, I was thinking that this could go either way. Fucking him right now, with minimal foreplay and letting him take complete control might be really hot. But the more I thought about it, I was not totally wanting to bone down. I assume he could sense my hesitation because he asked me, "is this ok?," and I took that opportunity to be like, uh, no. Really, I felt like it was an awkward transition and that he was either a) nervous/inexperienced or b) a jerk. Giving him the benefit of the doubt I was like fuck it (heh) and went back to the make out cuz, you know, boners are fun to be around and I wasn’t, like going to leave.

I ended up giving him a quick bj, then the night was pretty much over after he hopped out of bed to do a few “bong rips” and then didn’t go down on me. And I never called him again.

Anyway, I kind of last track of this story. I need an editor.